:S Part 2

Need to type it out to get it off me ..

I went to long face to tell him that we will start the handover at 945am when he is ready. Long face acknowledged it.

At 10am... Long face walked past my cubicle.

Long Face: Are you waiting for me? or Am i waiting for u?
Me: O, i am waiting for u.
Long Face: How come u never come and find me?
Me: I know you are busy with your stuff. Once u settled your stuff, i am sure u will come over.
Long Face: Everyone is BUSY. (Den he walked off to do his stuff)

I am sure I have enuff of Long face syndrome to last me the week. That will attribute to the 10% irritating factor of a week. I am sure the next 90% of the week is gonna be great because, what irritating stuff can happen has happened.

:S

Arrghh!

What a start to my morning. I went to work today, and this colleague coldly said to me that i used the wrong copy for the installation. From what i recalled, my other colleague told me to use that copy in that folder and that was the ONLY copy there.

The conversation goes like this.

Long Face: We found out the problem, u used the wrong installation exe, it was compiled in 08.
Me: Oh.. But i only saw that copy in the folder which ABC had told me to installed from.
Long Face: Anyway, problem is solved. (*He then turned his back towards me n face the com n start doing his work with a LONG face*)

I know I am leaving and u are being handover alot of stuff. But PLS! I seriously nv compiled my code in 08 before, it was always in 03. I dunno who put that wrong copy in.

Never mind. I got to calm down

Irritating

I never like people who are unresponsive n MIA mode.

HellO???? Are you that BUSYyy???

If they continue to be in the world on their own, its hard to connect with them. A friendship take 2 hands to clap. I am trying my best to make things right.

I must not let their MIA mode affect me. Really such a draining effect. I am already feeling the fatigue from attending classes every mon, wed, fri n sat. And i am attending church class on tue. Thur is gym time. Sun is tuition time. I am really packed to the max. If they really want to MIA, pls let me know at the very least. I am tired of calling n smsing n msning to a wall.

Stop this.

"Empire State of Mind" Jay-Z | Alicia Keys [OFFICIAL VIDEO]

I love this song! Concrete Jungle where dreams are made of...

Big Lights will inspire u! :)

Anxiety Pangs!

I suddenly felt so anxious about stuff. Worried about this and that.

List of worried stuff:

1) My real estate agent job

I have been talking to people, there were positive and negative comments. Sometimes certain negative comments make me doubt my own ability. But i just have to trust in HIM.

2) Real estate course

I have read about the pending gov announcement in July. I am worried that if i take the course now, it will be deemed as a substandard course and i may have to take another course. Hence my money will be wasted. I am worried that if i do not take the course, i may not be able to be an agent.

3) Bintan Holiday

I am planning to go for a holiday with my friends. But i was looking through the websites for promotion packages. All seems to be pricey and undervalued. No meals. Just hotel stay. Of course i shouldn't think too much. Just pay and enjoy. But part of my brain wants me to choose the best price n best package. Ultimately because i am going to rely on my savings for the next few months.

4) My stomach

Apparently, i forgotten to ate my medicine, now its giving me trouble. But i have to see doctor this friday for a review on my stomach. Because i have been on 3 weeks medication, i have to go back to doctor for a review to see whether i should be put on another round of medicine for my tummy.

The thing is I cannot apply for leave this friday. Apparently, i was supposed to be at a Linux course. But since i quit, i didn't have to attend it. But the admin didn't clear my calendar. I emailed them but no reply. I was thinking if i can take leave this friday, i can see doctor, apply for my real estate course and collect my name card + ID.

5) My current job

Currently, i have 14 more days to go before my last day at work. And 11 out of 14 days, i need to handover my programs, my modules and my documents to my colleagues. So left with 3 days to finish up my existing program, debug some of it, pack my cubicle, clear my hard disk, etc... Its giving me a headache because when i program, i need to have a clear mind. Having all these anxiety doesn't help me at all. I need to calm down. Keep cool.

There you go... anxious anxious anxious..

I got to stay calm. Plan my things. I can do this.

Give my worries to HIM.

Anxious Ant,
*\/*

Hilarious!

Today, my mum called me and tell me that MOE had sent a letter to me. There is an interview for me on 15 April 2010. My heart stopped for awhile. Because today is 20 April!

We just moved into our new place so we didn't expect mails to come to our house, thus the infrequent checking of the mailbox at our place.

So... I called MOE up and tell them that i just knew about the interview. They were adamant that there was a sms being sent when the letter was being sent out. I said i seriously didn't received. So they checked my application.

AND>>>>>

I had actually submitted my HP number details wrongly! I remember checking it 3 times! Its really funny.

What's more funny is that the MOE letter mentioned that i was shortlisted for Primary School PE teacher. I definitely didn't apply for primary school. So i checked the PE syllabus.. And i really got a shock!

For PE trainee teachers, they have 2 years of training and 75% of the time is spent on sports like gymnastics, track n field, swimming, dance, fitness n conditioning... etc.. its really alot.. And to be a PE teacher, u got to take the test which includes badminton, netball, agility run, 25m swim, forward roll and to attempt one of the following activities (Cartwheels or Headstand or Handstand).

When i saw these, i just couldn't stop laughing. Its how weird things turned out to be.

Cheers,
*\/*

Sunny Sunday

Today i woke up feeling happy. Its because today is my 3rd communion. Communion is a rite where all the baptised catholics will queue up to receive the body of christ in the form of bread. Upon receiving it, they will return to the seat and they will reflect on God's love upon them. They will reflect how God was with them, how God helped them and how God showed his mercy on them. So usually, the emo part comes in here.

Last Sunday, i felt tears in my eyes when i ate the bread. Because i was feeling down due to stuffs happening around me and i felt that no matter how down i was, I can always be assured that God is watching me. HE never leaves me alone.

So, today, i went church. After the communion, i felt GOd's love through the people around me. Felt like tearing. Because it was a tough week and i was able to pull through it with the love and concerns from my friends.

But there's one other incident that touched me today....


WHAT is it?

......


Today i had stomachache on my way to tuition so i was late. I went toilet twice along the journey. Thank God for the toilets built in the mrt station. In the end, i arrived at 10am for tuition. When it ended, it was already 1215nn. I was sad. Because i was planning to go for church at 1215nn at the CHurch of Perpetual Succour at Siglap Hill which was around bedok area. Den i was thinking there will be no chance to go for mass today because i have another tuition at 3pm. So i was pretty down.

DEN>>>>>

I saw my handphone. There was a sms. Apparently my 3pm tuition was postponed til 2nd May. I was so happy when i read it! Firstly, i can go church and secondly, i can go home and rest because i had stomachache.

So I really thank God for his mercy and grace that i can attend church today. I guess when u really want to spend time with God, there will always be chance to do that.

All in all, a great sunday. I know why they say its an obligation for catholics to go church on Sunday. Because it will give you the strength and faith to go through the week ahead. It really does.

Hope it isn't too preachy in this post. :)

Have a great week!

Love,
*-*

Encouraging Words

Thanks so much for all the encouraging words that was said to me for the past few days including today!

I totally agree with what my friends said to me. Below are the lists of encouraging words that was said to me and i am going to keep a list to remember. So, if ever i feel down, i can look back at this list.

1) I am fortunate that my past left me. Imagine how terrible and tough my life will be if i go over? Imagine when things fail when i got there? Divorce? Starting all over would be so much harder.

2) Guys are part of an equation. I have my friends and HIM here with me. I can still live without guys. But without HIM, my friends n family's support, i wouldn't be able to live with strength.

3) I am NEVER alone.

4) If your past stays with u, given his character, he will give up on u whenever the going gets tough. Do u want such a partner for your future?

5) He doesn't love u, he is happy with his life. Only when he is down and alone, he finds you. Do u want to be a standby? No, rite?

6) U are so much better off without him. Really.

7) U deserve someone better.

8) U deserve to be happy.

9) Everything is in HIS plan, it is going the way HE wants it to be. It will be the best plan for me. Always remember, it is in HIS will not mine.

10) HE loves us so much that HE wants the best for us. All the down times are to make us stronger and grow closer to HIM. So when the next down time comes, we will be able to have faith n draw strength from HIM.

11) You have one life. Do u want to waste your time thinking about someone who doesn't feel sad when u cry? U got to live your life.

12) Look around you, Eileen, u are really blessed. Your friends love u. Your family love u. You have a place to stay. You have food for every meal. You have clothes to wear. You have so much around u!

13) Remember last time when u did badly for school and got into a neighbourhood school? U were down. U thought why life is bad for u? Remember? But see how it turns out, u found ur besties! Without falling down, u wouldn't be able to pick up something precious.

14) U are an amazing gal. U will be happy.

15) Eileen, we love you. We always be there for u.

16) Next time, when u look back, u will laugh at how silly u were. Cos u will be with a great guy who will love u and cherish u. I am so sure of that.

17) Remember the times when u were down? U googled for courses and all ur trainers happened to be from RCIA? God is telling u that he is with u.

18) U know what? U got baptised! And that is the most important to be happy right now! All the more u should know that HE will never abandon u.

19) Look at you, u are gyming. You look great!

20) Last, but not least......

..........................

You are so blessed to have received so much encouraging words from your friends. And there are so much more that u didn't list here. U can see that there is so much love for u. Bask in it. Be happy.

Gaining strength,
*-*

One down point in my Life...

Its never a nice feeling to know that your past moved on within days. Hanging out with a gal. Within months, the gal proclaiming her space on his wall. Pasting pictures on his wall.

I really wonder how can that past moved on so fast? What have happened to the love between us? Disappear in thin air? What happened to the tough times we went through? What happened to the sweet times we had? What happened to the support he has always received from me? What actually happened?

Its heart piercing feeling. Its that kind of feeling that can let u bawl your eyes out for hours or days. Its never a nice feeling.

But this phrase really supported me abit..

His love is always with you, His promises are true. And when we give Him all our cares,we know He will see us through.

My friends really supported me. Without them, i wouldn't be able to pull through. Thank God for all the love i received from my friends.

Really hoped as each day goes by, i will not be affected by such news. I believe i will. Cos my friends believe in me.

Tears,

*-*

Oh my!

I just heard some news that i felt sad upon hearing it.

One of my colleague told me that my resignation was announced during the cluster meeting. A cluster meeting where most of the people from all departments would attend to update things.

It was shocking to me because i haven't talked to the big boss about it and the big boss announced. This shows that there is no intention of keeping me. Abit sad when i hear it. It was even more sad that my department people got to hear it from other people about my resignation. I wanted to personally tell them.

I guess this is working life. I got to see beyond this. Beyond everything.

I am starting a new phase of life. It gonna be a good one. I just have to put my heart into it. :)

Mad Rush

I took leave today to settle some outstanding issues and run some errands. Thought that i could take a break today. But nope, i didn't had a chance to take a breather. Let me tell u why...

1030am:Woke up and ate my 1st dose of medicine
1030-1130am: Bathe and put on my makeup to look my best for my phototaking
1130-1215pm: Cook Lunch
1215-1pm: Ate lunch and 2nd dose of medicine
1-145pm: Touched up my makeup cos i was perspiring like mad after eating my noodles
145-2pm: Travelled down to harbourfront
2-215pm: Took photo for my application
215-230pm: Settled my bank stuff
230-3pm: Took my 2nd Dose of cervical cancer vaccine
3-330pm: Travelled down to Toa Payoh
330-430pm: Settled my outstanding stuff for my new job
430-5pm: Went to Novena and got ready for gym
5-615pm: GYM TIME! (I always love gym time cos its really tough... :p)
615-645pm: Bathe
645-730pm: Dinner
730-10pm: Church Class
10-11pm: Travelled back home
11pm onwards: Finally a time to take a small break and relax...

But i like the way i planned my time. It went smoothly. Managed to settle all my stuff.. Yippee!!

Baptism Part 3

Getting ready.. I like this pose..

My Godma carrying all my bag. I got to give her credit for this. Because it is really heavy! :)

After my baptism, i look pretty ok after being dunked 3 times in that cloudy pool of water. :)

We were presented the Light of Christ by our Godparent. And they had my baptism name written on the candle. I was told that whenever i feel down, i can light up the candle and know that God will always be a light. It serves as a reminder.

Can you see my shiny forehead? They anointed me with the oil as a confirmation for my baptism.

Baptism Part 2

Rain of Blessings were upon us when we went to the church...

My Bestie being my Godma

I love the interior of the church :)

Baptism

St Joseph Church, the place where i got baptised. Its 91 years old! So glad to have my baptism there as the church look so beautiful. One will feel a sense of calmness when one steps into it. Loving it!

Tough Decision

Today, i had a heavy heart when i went to work. I have been thinking about it for quite awhile. I do not see myself going far in this job.

So i tendered my resignation. It was a tough one.

But.... when my boss called me in and had a talk with me. I felt my stand wavering. Really wavering. He is right, what do i want in life? What are my strengths?

Of course i thought about my goals in life. I know my strengths. My goal in life is to be able to achieve something that i am proud of. I was thinking, if there is no risk taken, there will be regrets later.

So, yes, i am going to tell my boss that my decision is settled.

Cheers,
Eileen

Many New Beginnings....

Its me again since i last blogged 3 years ago. So many things had happened. But i will slowly reveal it as i regain my blogging frequency.

However, on a happier note, I graduated from NTU on Jul 2008! It was a great feeling. During my 4 years of studies in NTU, i learned and grow alot. In terms of character, mental strength, maybe physical strength (Due to the 5Kg bag i carried everyday to school), i have gained so much. And i am so thankful for all my friendships that i had made over the past 4 years. Without them, i wouldn't be able to graduate with a smile on my face.

That's it for tonight. Stayed Tuned. More updates coming up... :)

Love,
Starting all over again :)